The bat hanging upside down laughs at the topsy-turvy world. ~Japanese proverb
I Monkey here.
Well, it’s about time I got in on the fun.
Recently, I accompanied Mama downstairs for my early morning potty call, and I caught sight of something that looked out of place.
Mama was filling my water bowl, so I didn’t want to bother her, but then I heard her gasp, “What was that?”
Something brown and fuzzy had swooped behind her, and SHE SAW IT.
I’d had my suspicions before, but now I Monkey know she’s got eyes in the back of her head!
Well, she marched right out into the garage and returned with a net attached to a long pole.
“Whatcha got there, Mama?”
She ignored me and flipped on the light in the living room, but apparently didn’t see anything.
I Monkey heard her growling, “How dare you get into my house when I’ve been so very careful?”
“C’mon, Mama, help a pup out here. Tell me what you’re looking for, and I’ll help you find it.”
That’s fair, isn’t it?
Then Mama unhitched the gate to the basement, switched on a light, and stomped down the stairs.
Did she think she’d sound more menacing by making a lot of noise?
By this time, I Monkey had lost all interest in breakfast, so I barked a few times and trotted down beside her.
No way was I going to stay on one level and leave her down there alone. Nope. I’m the Protector around here, see?
Eventually, Mama caught sight of a brown Splotch resting near one of the windows. Quick as a flash, she brought that net-thing into an overhead smash from her tennis days, capturing the Splotch.
Well, I Monkey couldn’t believe what I was seeing!
Then she carried Splotch outdoors (trying — but failing — to corral me inside), gave her net a few shakes, and out popped Splotch!
Which she informed me was a Bat. And they don’t belong indoors. And the next time I see one inside, I’m to tell her about it.
LOUDLY.
I Monkey have read Dallas’s accounts of Bat-Catching around here, and part of me is jealous that he got all the fun. But he never got TWO episodes in one day like I did!
You see, before dinner that evening, Mama saw another Splotch near the laundry room and snagged it, too. She’s quick, that Mama of mine.
So there you have it. I Monkey am proclaiming Bat-Catching a great game, one I want to participate in as often as possible. It’s way better than, say, Trying-to-Attack-Mr. Vacuum.
How about it, Mama? Let’s lure another Bat in tonight, okay?
Note: Did you know that more than 300 species of fruit rely on bats for pollination? For more Bat Facts, visit the U.S. Department of the Interior.
Musings by an ND Domer's Mom 
Holy Crap, Batman! A bat in the house? And then another one on the same day? Oh wait – but could it have been the same one? Great story telling, Monkey – and I’m sure much better than Mom would have done.
Yes, Mr. Frank, you read it right: I Monkey counted TWO bats in the house in the same day! Mama doesn’t think it was the same bat, but who knows? It’s not like either one had an ID tag on it, right? And thank you — I’m sure my storytelling skills top Mama’s (heh heh!!)
Monkey, I did not know that about bats and pollination. Yay to Mama for using a net to capture then release the bats. I certainly admire how quick and efficient she is. But no doubt your encouragement was a big help.
Miss Laurie, I Monkey had never seen a bat up close — it was positively scary! Those webbed feet, wings, and evil expressions — not to mention that nasty clicking sound they make. Ugh. Those things definitely belong outdoors, not inside my house!
What a great adventure you had, Monkey! And what a good bat-catcher your Mama is! Bats are good creatures and I love to watch them “working” but no, they don’t belong in the house.
Miss Kelly, I Monkey could easily go the rest of my life without ever seeing another of those nasty bats! Mama says she’s seen them swooping outside early in the morning when I’m supposed to be pottying, but I just thought they were early-birds! No wonder she doesn’t want them indoors.
Monkey, you had me on the edge of my seat reading this; wondering what it was the Splotch was!?!?
A BAT?!?!?!? And TWO bats in the same day????
I think you and Mama should start your own Bat-Catching service. And you could call it, “Two-Up to Bat!”
Great story, Monkey! And tell Mama I said, “Good going on the bat catching!”
Happy Sunday, you two!
X
Mr. Ron, I Monkey kid you not — there were TWO of them! I wonder if they were related?? Anyway, they should’ve kept themselves outdoors, and they wouldn’t have suffered Mama’s catching net! (I, too, was impressed at her mad skills, and my good man, you’ve come up with a super title for our Bat-Catching Service, hee hee!)
Mama said to tell you we’re finally getting some nicer weather (I Monkey don’t give a flying fig about stuff like that, but she seems to!). All I know is, it’s not as sticky and hot. We’ll be happy to share! Licks and hugs, Monkey
Great work, Mama, and back-up support, Monkey. Bats want to live outside, they just get lost sometimes. 😉
Miss Eliza, I Monkey thank you. But if these two are typical, Central Illinois has a real problem with confused bats. Maybe they need to be fed some of that Prevagen stuff for memory support!
Fruit bats are fascinating — but not in the house! I’m sure any bats that find themselves inside are as upset about the situation as the humans whose territory they’ve invaded! They are important pollinators for night blooming flowers, just like certain moths. What I wonder is where they’re hanging out in the daytime that allows them inside your domain. If your mama doesn’t know how they’re getting in, it might be worth checking out!
Miss Linda, I Monkey don’t know if these two bats were near as upset as my poor mama was! She pretends to be a Celtic warrior princess, but I saw how that net was shaking in her hands.
She and my gramma had a handyman come and check out the bat situation. He thought they might be getting in through a teeny crack in the eaves, so he boarded it up. And yet the bats keep coming. Hmm, maybe they want to change places with me and Mama? Something tells me, though, that she won’t cotton to that!
Would it be fair to say the visitors are driving your mama batty?
HaHa, I Monkey think that’s a very fair description! You know, Mama says bats are able to squeeze into spaces the diameter of a dime! Typically, they enter through exhaust vents, air intakes, tiny spaces around doors and windows, and so on. With me and Mama, they’re probably hitching a ride indoors when she has to keep the door open longer than usual, thanks to my big bottom being a slowpoke, hee hee!
Oh Monkey! This is Penny, the sheltie-girl, and I’ve never seen a bat. At least not inside. Sometimes when mom takes me out for my last walk of the day and it’s getting dark mom says the bats are flying overhead. But I never look at them. There’s too much to sniff on the ground for me to be worried about something way up there! But in the HOUSE??? Oh no, I would not allow a bat to come in our HOUSE. Why, this is MY CASTLE! Nothing gets by me, not a fly, or an ant or…wait a minute. Mom says there’s a mouse in the master bathroom tub. I didn’t know that, Mom! I should probably go bark at it, right? And I’m sure Daddy needs my help handling it. So I guess I have to sign off for now.
-Your guardian friend, Penny.
Miss Penny, I Monkey have seen flying things outside, too, but like you said, there’s too many interesting smells (plus stray cats and stupid rabbits) on the ground for me to be looking up. I guess I Monkey just assumed they were birds, which don’t much interest me anyway.
A mouse in your bathtub? I Monkey have never seen a mouse. How interesting! It’s definitely something to bark at. I’m glad you pawrents have you to help them with interlopers like that! What would these humans do without us?!?
I’m sure you could efficiently capture the bat Monkey. Next time just go after it. Mama willet involved sooner or later. Great story.
Mr. John, I Monkey didn’t particularly like the noise those bats made. It was kind of a clicking sound. They didn’t look edible either. And poor Mama made it clear that they’re NOT welcome indoors, so I guess I’ll have to watch when she opens up the back door that one doesn’t scoot inside with me!
I think you will do a great job, Monkey.
Maybe. I Monkey kind of get a strange thrill out of watching Mama try to catch ’em, though!
I can imagine. That has to be a sight.
😉
😁
Monkey, you are a great storyteller my paw friend! Yorkie here to tell you that while I was reading your post to my mama she was rolling with laughter. She told me to google “What is a Splotch?”She couldn’t imagine it. She could imagine your mama dancing around with a butterfly net inside your house though. Google doesn’t even know what is a Splotch!
When your mama claimed it was a bat I still didn’t know what is a bat? My mama explained that it is what happens when a black bird loves a frog right before Halloween. That was frightening enough!! Bats must be outside only!!! 🐾🐾🧹🦇
Hi Miss TD and Yorkie! I Monkey am pretty sure a Splotch is also a blob. Or a smear. Whatever. It was nasty! I’m glad Mama caught it in her net because I sure didn’t want that flapping thing inside my mouth! *shudders*
Yes, bats belong outside, where they can eat mosquitoes and such. We don’t have those things in our house, and the bats would eventually starve to death. Yuck!
Oh my goodness, Monkey, it sounds like your Mama has been escorting bats outside often enough to be prepared with a net for that purpose. I’ve never had a bat in my house and can’t imagine how I would react. Once I heard about a friend who found a bat on his bath towel one morning…
Eeww, Miss Barbara — a bat on a bath towel? I Monkey would have swooned, for sure! And I can imagine poor Mama, reaching for her towel and finding one of those nasty things encamped on it! You’re fortunate not to have had any indoors. They belong outside. Maybe Mama should embrace the whole thing and go pick out a bat house from the Lowe’s store and encourage them to stay out there??
How fun! I’ve never gotten to hunt anything bigger than a fly in my house (although I’m quite good at that, as I almost always both catch and eat them). But I’d sure love to give a bat a try. I bet I’d catch it too!
Love, Finn
Oh, Finn, I Monkey don’t think you’d want to eat one of those nasty bats! They make an awful clicking noise, and they’ve got webbed fingers! And Mama says some of them even have rabies (though I guess we’re protected because of our shots, huh?) Anyway, you have a standing invitation to come over and help me chase them down — bet we’ll get all sorts of yummy treats for our efforts!!