Sharing Secrets

When you work for yourself like I do, it’s sometimes tempting to skip the makeup and dressing routine.

After all, who sees you except your trusty computer? And it doesn’t judge.

But I’ve never given in to that temptation. Every morning, rain or shine, outside appointment or not, I “do” my face and put on something other than PJs.

Why? Is it vanity? Or habit? Or fear of scaring people who might show up at my door? Or some combination of all that?

I had an aunt (she divorced my uncle, so I guess she’s technically not still my aunt) who used to get up WAY before her husband and kids. Just so she could “put her face on” and they wouldn’t have to see her au naturel.

I used to think that was a bit radical. I mean, did she expect them to love her any less in her bare face than in her made-up face?

Or maybe she just couldn’t stand the thought of accidentally seeing her own nude face reflected in a mirror?

Anyway, that’s not my concern. I’m taking notes from my computer and refusing to judge.

Some women have gorgeous skin and need very little touching up to keep it that way. Lucky them!

Others have issues. Sun damage, acne or its scars, wrinkles or blotchiness.

I happen to have Rosacea.

Sounds lovely, doesn’t it? A rosy complexion.

But who wants to look like they’re blushing all day every day? Or like they’re an alcoholic? When they’re NOT!

As a child, I had a peaches-and-cream complexion with light blonde hair (typical Rosacea appearance, thanks in part to my Irish heritage). Shortly after I turned 30, I noticed a persistent pinkness on my cheeks that showed up when I blushed but didn’t go away after the blush should have been over.

People, even doctors, pointed out that I must have been in too much sun. But I haven’t consciously let the sun touch my face in many years; rather, I douse my skin in sunscreen and often wear a brimmed hat.

Finally, I found a dermatologist who diagnosed my Rosacea and put me on medication. No, it’s not curable, but how many obituaries have you read where the person died from Rosacea?

And I’m in good company — former President Bill Clinton, J.P. Morgan, and Mariah Carey all had/have Rosacea. So did W.C. Fields.

But I’m one of the lucky ones. I caught it early, before the symptoms could worsen and involve more than just my face. In fact, most people I know never would guess I have it!

So, there you have my rationale for makeup. To cover my red face.

Is it vanity? Perhaps, but that’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

Any secrets you’d care to share?

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17 thoughts on “Sharing Secrets

  1. I tried growing my hair longer recently because, like Nora Ephron, I feel bad about my neck. But then I kept thinking about how stupid it was to go through all that trouble and inconvenience to protect myself from somebody catching a side-view; like they’re not going to notice from the front? And unless I grow my chin hairs really long, nothing will help with that. Scarves, turtlenecks? Bleah.

    I mean, who am I doing this for? Would I go to all that trouble for the grocery clerk? The gals in my book club? My husband’s eyes aren’t that good, and he happens to like my hair short, because then he doesn’t have to wait so long for me to get ready.

    Finally, as you’ve seen in my blog, I’m trying to grow beyond vanity, so the heck with it. I gave away my rollers and hair products – again. I swear, I have finally learned my lesson. I think.

    • Ah, Lynne, perhaps “vanity” is just part of being human?? I know what you mean about growing hair out, though. When I see a lovely twenty-something with long, luxurious locks, I long for the days when my hair, too, was long. But shorter hair on me is more manageable and your husband is right about it being faster. Thanks for sharing!

  2. I think we all want to be seen in our “best light” at one time or another. I used to always put on my face; now I seldom do. I think I’ve just gotten lazy!

  3. I guess my secret is I l love makeup and cosmetic counters and being a “girl.” So I feel like anything you do that makes you feel happy about yourself–is a good thing. Including going Au La Natural. I remember when I was little my mom always use to say around 4:30–“I guess we better brush our teeth, comb our hair and put on a little lipstick and perfumem your daddy will be home soon. I looked forward to that time of day and often did the same thing before Joe came home…not just for him but also for myself. These days I do it just for myself but I always whisper to myself as I dab a little perfume behind my ears that I’m worth it… :-D

    • You absolutely ARE worth it, Katybeth! What a touching memory of your mom “fancying up” for your dad’s return home from work. And what a loving and good example they gave you! Thanks for sharing!

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  5. I don’t really have a secret to share, but I at least put sunscreen and and mineral foundation on. I am self-conscious about some sun spots I have on my cheek. To me, they are so obvious with my fair skin so I feel better when I think they are less noticeable. On my work at home days, nothing gets done beauty wise unless I have to leave the house for something. And I’ve been known to throw sweats on over jammies to walk the kids to school. I have no idea why they walk five steps in front of me…

    • I don’t even OWN sweatpants, Janna, so I got a kick out of the mental picture of your boys walking five steps in front of you! I’d have done that as a kid, too, so I totally empathize, haha! As for the sun spots — well, your dry, hot climate is probably to blame. Good that you’re taking care of them before they multiply. Thanks for sharing!

  6. Debbie, good for you for putting on the makeup, even when you’re working from home. On days I work at home, mostly on weekends, I don’t bother. But then I suddenly have to leave the house to go to the grocery store and how I hate when I forget to put some makeup on. Not even an little lipstick (my must-have makeup). Last time I did this, I didn’t realize until I got home and looked in the mirror that I had gone out this way. Naked face. Yuck!

    • When I put on my trashiest, ragged jeans, that’s when I run into somebody — either a client or one of my son’s friend’s moms, or whatever. How embarrassing! I just know the same thing would happen if I stepped out of my door sans my cool green cover cream! Thanks for sharing, Monica!

  7. I think I would get up and dress/do my face every day simply because if I didn’t, the whole day would go by and I never would.

    I was diagnosed with Rosacea a few years ago. It was extremely noticeable and I’d experience flare-ups on occasion. I had a prescription and used it daily. Now? Nothing. No redness. No flare-ups. Makes me wonder if it wasn’t really Rosacea.

    • You’re lucky if you don’t have it, Terri. I use a facial gel just once a day (before bedtime), and mine really isn’t bad at all. I’ve seen so many people lately that have a MUCH worse condition than I do, and they’re obviously not being treated. That’s a crying shame, for the stuff can spread to the eyes if left untreated. It’s nothing to play with. Thanks for sharing!

  8. Debbie, don’t hate me, but I’m one of the lucky ones. I have great skin so the only time I wear makeup is if I’m going out. And by going out I don’t mean walking Roxy. I mean going out to dinner, the in laws and so forth. However, I’m a slave of face creams. I’ve been “taking care” of my skin since I was 13. I have an arsenal of day creams, night creams, exfoliators, face masks, and the like. Yes, such is my fear that I will wrinkle prematurely. I like going bare faced because I feel like my skin can breathe. I can’t imagine wearing make up to just sit in the house but then I understand and respect why some women might feel differently. A couple of years ago, the Significant Other, who’s very fair and has light hair, was diagnosed with what the dermatologist called “a mild case of Rosacea.” He was prescribed a cream that he used for a little over a year and the redness disappeared. The dermatologist also suggested he buy a moisturizer by Clinique called “Redness Solution.” I swear that stuff is like a miracle in a bottle! Have you ever tried it? If you haven’t, it might be a good idea if you dropped by the Clinique counter and asked for a sample. It’s called “Redness Solution Urgent Relief Cream.” And for the record, good for you for doing what’s necessary for you to feel good throughout the day! :)

    • Bella, you are SO lucky! My mom has that olive-skinned look, and she’s never had to fret over redness. My sis doesn’t have this worry, either. Guess I got it from my late father. Sigh. Since green neutralizes red, I regularly use Eucerin’s Redness Relief, as well as the medicated gel my dermatologist prescribed. I didn’t know Clinique had a “Redness Solution.” I’ll have to check that out — thanks ever so much for the suggestion!

  9. My secret is exfoliate and moisturize regularly and stay out of the sun as much as possible. I have a chronic illness and years ago I met a woman who was stricken with severe RA. Everytime I went to visit her she was dressed up like she was going out. I adopted her attidue and wear makeup and jewerly everyday as possible. It has really helped me to feel better about myself even though I’m home. I’m closing in on 60 years old this July and I see my face is trying to follow my age…but I’m battling it by my exfoliate and moisturize routine…but the age thing is winning LOL.

    So I’m thinking….just to accept my face with all its maturity and thank God for what I have. I look forward to the day I have my new glorified face when I get to heaven. It will be perfection! Until then Deb…lots of face products, prayer and hoping for the best. I also believe that when your insides are beautiful the outside won’t matter. I can tell Debbie…you are blessed inside and out!! Have a great day you beautiful woman you!!

    • What sweet thoughts, Tanya! I am blessed to have such dear friends! Yes, when you think of all the people who never lived long enough to age, our outward appearance is a pretty small thing, isn’t it? Thanks for putting things into perspective!

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