Give-and-Take, Avian Style

A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson, Journals (American essayist and poet)

“C’mon, dear. It’s time to go.”

No answer.

Mister glances around and pins a stern eye on his lady.

“Perhaps you didn’t hear me, my sweet. I said, Let’s go.”

Complete silence. Refusal to make eye contact. And positively no inclination to move from the sun-warmed parking lot.

(See for yourselves:)

Mrs. Goose

Missus Goose

Mister is not used to having his authority questioned. He blinks a few times and gives a little shake of his majestic head.

“What? You’re not going?” he asks. “Is that what you said, darling?”

Missus turns her attention to her feathers, which she picks at. She settles deeper into the pavement and turns from Mister, who’s making a spectacle of himself.

As usual.

It’s a busy shopping mall, and the lunch hour traffic is heavy. People with only an hour off during their workday must hurry if there’s something they need to pick up.

The last thing they have time for is a bickering pair of Canada geese.

Mister sees that and frets.

“Look, my love, there are cars all over the place. I can’t stand the thought of you getting hit…or watching while they scrape you up off the pavement.”

Missus remains calm. People spy her on her concrete throne and steer a clear berth. Some even offer her a smile.

But Mister is becoming frantic. He bellows and honks, his loud voice extending like a siren. He flaps his immense wings and does a dance of sorts.

“This isn’t funny, honey. Get up NOW and let’s go.”

Missus continues to preen and ignore him.

Eventually Mister resorts to what most females consider the magic word.

“There’s a sale over at Dick’s,” he urges. “I wanted to be first in line, but you can see there’s already a crowd beating us to the doors.”

Mr. Goose

Mister Goose

When his mate still doesn’t move, Mister realizes her stubbornness is what piqued his interest in the first place. She’s not going to move until she‘s ready, so he gives up.

“All right, then. We’re in this thing for life, so I’ll stay here with you. But don’t you think we should move closer to some water?”

Note: Canada Geese are fascinating creatures and are found year round across the northern tier of the United States.

31 thoughts on “Give-and-Take, Avian Style

  1. There’s just no explaining the avian mind, is there? Of course, there’s no explaining plenty of creatures. This time of year, we’ll begin seeing alligators showing up on residential front porches, etc. A swimming pool I can understand — but a porch?

    I once caught a glimpse of some police herding a mama duck and her babies across a Houston area freeway. What we do for these critters!

    • I’d think a homeowner would have a heart attack, opening his front door and finding an alligator on the porch!! I’m especially careful with Dallas when we go south because I know gators can eat dogs. Not that we’ve ever seen one up close, but you never know.

      What nice officers for herding the duck family across the freeway — bet there were more than a few cameras recording that spectacle!

    • You know, Dawn, I had to wonder after writing this, whether SHE was the one making a spectacle of herself and wanting to go shopping, while HE was the one holding firm to his spot on the concrete?!?

  2. The missus is probably pooped from taking care of business and needed a rest…or hoping he’d take off so she could go shopping without him pestering her!

    • Sometimes it’s easier to shop alone. When I go with a friend, we have to separate anyway so we can hunt for things we want; then, we spend an inordinate amount of time searching for each other. What did we ever do without cell phones?!!

  3. *thunderous applause*’

    Debbie, this is HILARIOUS! How clever you are – the pictures, the dialogue, the quote – all BRILLIANT!

    Having lived in Orlando, Florida (where geese are everywhere) you nailed their personalities to a tee! They can be very stubborn and also aggressive. I used to live by a lake in Orlando, and there were times when the geese on the lake would actually run into the streets and try to attack moving cars – I kid you not – I saw it with my own eyes!

    Again, GREAT post, my friend! Have a super weekend!

    X to you and Dallas

    • Ron, thanks for verifying my little story. Part of me wondered if I was accurately capturing this pair’s personalities — glad her stubbornness and his frustration came across!

      Geese usually hang out near water, but these two were pretty far away from the wet stuff. Maybe flying by straight line would put them closer. And you’re so right — I’ve seen cars stop in the middle of the street just to let a line of geese pass through!

      Happy week to you, my dear! xx

    • I’m a sucker for happy endings, Kb! I didn’t see a nest, so I imagine Missus flew off when she got good and ready — and he tagged along with her (probably somewhat miffed he didn’t get to shop at Dick’s!!)

    • Thanks so much, Audrey! This is the first time I’ve run into geese in the mall’s parking lot — they were just too tempting for me to snap a photo. She looked pretty calm, all things considered…he, on the other hand, was ready to blow a gasket, ha!

    • Monica, I was one of those having too little time to pick up some things I needed, so I confess I hurried inside to shop. When I got back outside, Mister and Missus were gone, so I guess they worked out their issues. Thanks for the compliment, and I’m glad you enjoyed my story!

    • Aw, gee, thanks for saying such nice things! And you’re welcome around here any time — thanks for the follow, and now I’m off to check out some of your work.

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