Okay, show of hands.
How many of you got what you really wanted for Christmas this year?
Be honest, now.
Was the style exactly right, or the color, or the size, or the brand?
What about the price? Was it so extravagant that you knew somebody would be paying for it clear into next summer, or was it so cheap that you immediately thought of shoving it in a closet (or re-gifting next year)?
And what about Christmases past? How many of them truly lived up to your expectations?
We all have a tendency to build the holidays up. Happy television people, happy magazine people become our ideals.
In a frenzy, we decorate, bake, shop, wrap, and hide our presents from peeking eyes; we address Christmas cards; we browse online, salivating over untold goodies that we have to have NOW.
And in all the glitter and tinsel and sugar and trimmings, we lose sight of why we’re celebrating this day.
So it’s no wonder we find ourselves feeling let down when the last package is opened.
We’re not alone. Our kids pick up on this, and it’s not pretty.
Most parents know (and dread) “that look” on their kids’ faces.
The one that appears confused.
The darlings look around expectantly and ask, “Is that all?”
They might be sitting on the floor surrounded by mounds of wrapping paper and new treasures, yet there it is.
“Is that all?”
My Favorite Domer did it. My sister did it before him.
My late father, always the voice of reason, told a true story to put things into perspective.
When Dad was a child, money was very tight. It was the time of the Great Depression. Men were jumping out of windows to their deaths after learning their job was gone and so was their money. Women were taking in laundry. Folks were standing in bread lines. Everybody was hungry and tired and sick and scared.
One Christmas, Dad recalled, he wanted toys like the other kids. Something to play with, to enjoy in those wretched times.
But my grandparents could ill afford fancy toys. They did their best to put food on the table and clothes on the kids’ backs.
Still, it was Christmas, so my practical grandmother put together a special toy just for my Dad.
Imagine his surprise — and disappointment! — Christmas Day when he opened a marshmallow man, complete with candy cane arms and legs and a marshmallow head.
That was all.
No toys. Not even one.
Not even another present.
So while you’re squirreling that hideous sweater into the re-gifting closet, while you’re standing in yet another returns line at Wal-Mart, while you’re consoling (for the fifth time) a weeping child disappointed over not getting the latest-and-greatest, think about that.
And remember — it’s not the present, it’s the love behind the present, that truly matters.
We stopped giving gifts years ago, except for the kids, who get presents until they’re old enough to dig cash, and then when they’re 18 or so, that stops too. (we give my mom a little something, and my sis and I sneak each other a goodie, but it’s more spontaneous than a rule). My hubby and I give cards and we have a tradition that the card is chosen for the accuracy and meaning of the words. This year I just broke down and sobbed – my husband’s card was so touching.
Good suggestions, Lynne. I especially like the one about the cards. Too often, we don’t bother with those or grab something, anything, to tuck money into. It always means more when some careful thought goes along with it!
What an awesome post, Debbie … you hit the nail on the head! Happy New Year! * iz
Hey, Iz, glad you liked it! True story, too. We all have a bit of greed at this time of year. Happy New Year to you and yours and let’s stay in touch!
Loved this post! I absolutely agree that it’s the love behind the present that counts. I’m with Lynne ~ we only buy gifts for the children these days and maybe a few little gifts here and there. We are all so fortunate-if we want something, we buy it ourselves. This year we started a tradition of adopting a needy family and buying for them- much more gratifying. I really balk at the commercialism.
Happy New Year!
Ah, Kathy, you’re so right! We usually buy what we want, too (more often than not, when it’s on sale!), so it’s rough finding that perfect gift for everyone — and those returns lines are frustrating at best! Happy New Year to you and your family!