Wishing my Phone would Ring

I never thought I’d be this way.

Irritable. Scatter-brained.

I could blame it on lack of sleep, and that would be true.

I could blame it on this seemingly unending heat. True, also.

But digging deeper, I find the real source of my mood.

It’s Domer.

My darling son. He who is the apple of my eye.

You see, this weekend is the first home game of the 2013 football season for the University of Notre Dame.

And Domer and his pals have been planning for months to attend.

To do all the things — as an alum — that he instructed me I needed to do the very first time I went to a game weekend:

  • Watch the Trumpets in the Dome on Friday afternoon.
  • Follow the Band across campus on their marchout to the practice field.
  • Watch the Friday afternoon full Band practice.
  • Take a tour of the stadium on Saturday.
  • Wander around campus, enjoying the sights and sounds.
  • Watch Notre Dame play in their legendary stadium (and win, we hope!)
  • Attend a Dorm Mass after the game.
  • Perhaps eat dinner at his favorite dining hall with his buddies.
  • Go home on Sunday, exhausted but somehow rejuvenated.

So why is my nose out of joint?

Simple. Domer promised he’d call me on Friday to let me know he and his pals had arrived safely.

That’s all I asked. Just a quick call or a text message to relieve my fears.

Because this was his first “road trip.” And because LOTS of things could go wrong.

And because I come from a l-o-n-g line of worriers. And being a writer (who regularly kills off characters), I have a vivid imagination.

Is he stranded because he ran out of gas in Podunk, U.S.A.?

Did he stop for a bathroom break, have somebody conk him on the head, steal his car, and leave him injured?

Did he get lost picking up his friends and ALL of them have an accident on the freeway?

Sigh.

The only thing that will relieve my fears is hearing from my son.

If you’re in South Bend this weekend and see him, tell him to Phone Home, okay?

Thanks!

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36 thoughts on “Wishing my Phone would Ring

  1. “That’s all I asked. Just a quick call or a text message to relieve my fears.”

    And Debbie, I don’t blame you because even though I’m not a parent myself, I can tell that if I was, I’d want the same thing and would worry – especially being away at school and being his first road trip.

    But I have a feeling you WILL get a text or message before the day is over. Perhaps they got caught in traffic, so he’s been delayed in getting there.

    “And being a writer (who regularly kills off characters), I have a vivid imagination.”

    OMG…that made me laugh! I too have a vivid and DRAMATIC imagination. Perhaps it’s the ITALIAN in us???

    And yes, the heat and humidity has been pretty bad here as well. We had a break about a week ago, but it’s right back to being HOT again. God…I can’t WAIT for fall!

    Have a super holiday weekend, dear lady!

    X

    • Ron, I don’t know whether it’s the dramatic Italian or the fanciful Irish, but I DO have a vivid imagination! Sometimes it’s quite helpful, you know, but others? Not so much.
      Thanks for empathizing with me. Yes, I got a brief text message last night, letting me know he’s alive and safe. That’s really all a parent can ask for — I didn’t expect him to interrupt his “pal time” for a lengthy phone conversation, and he didn’t take a laptop so no email. At any rate, the message was sufficient to allow me to sleep last night, ha!
      Have a fabulous Labor Day weekend and hang on — cooler temps are coming (or so they say!)

  2. They just don’t get it, do they? I don’t think its even being inconsiderate, more like clueless. It’s hard once worry grips us to back out of it until we know everything is ok. And the only way we know everything is ok is by a quick text or phone call. It doesn’t help to here he is, “Just fine” unless you hear it from him. I went through this at the beginning of summer when Cole drove up to St.Paul with his friend and his friends dad to bring back the Bug, It was 2am in the morning and I was out of the loop and had worked myself up to near hysteria. I knew it was ridiculous, but I just couldn’t shake the fear. When I finally heard from them I was exhausted with worry and fear, and when Cole said, ” Mom, you really need to get a grip, and choose not to worry.” He saw a side of me he had never seen before, I was furious. Like, you my imagination had run wild. I get it. And Cole came home safe and sound. I bet, Domer is enjoying his new car, his freedom, and is totally caught up in the excitement of the weekend, and you’ll hear from his soon, I promise. Kids are rotten. :-D

    • Only a parent truly understands, huh? Now I see why my own dear mom — even to this day! — insists on a call if I’m on the road. I used to mind, but being a parent myself has made me realize it’s not too much to ask.
      I remember Cole’s trip for the Bug. I didn’t know, however, that you were in such a tizzy. You should’ve called me!
      Thankfully, I heard from Domer before the night was over. Just a brief text, but enough to relieve my fears. And Mom’s. With grandkids, she now has even more reason to worry, ha!

  3. KB’s right. It is cluelessness. I hope you’re not still waiting. I’m sorry if you are, but that doesn’t mean disaster, it means he has a Y chromosome and is clueless.

    • Thanks, Oma. Yes, I finally heard from him, thank goodness! I knew all along he wasn’t being mean or stubborn or rebellious. He just “forgot.” As my parents often told me, “Just wait until you have kids of your own.” Then maybe he’ll “get it.” Y’think??

  4. Sister Debbie you are correct we are a family that worries. I remember when your nephew John had his first internship in Washington for Senator Trent Lott, that Monday “A Date which will Live in Infamy”
    I was in Florida on business and I called John to see how his first day went. He proceeded to slur his words and had no idea where he was. The interns all went out for Gin Martinis. He was trying to get back to his dorm. I stopped the car and called Suzie and said, Sue we have a problem and with that the phone hung up and the Italian Stallion took over!!! Somehow she got him in a cab back to George Washington University where she had campus security waiting at the gate to help him to his dorm. She asked the officer if he would be ok and with that he said sure mam he just threw up!
    Believe me your daddy never stopped woring about you girls,
    Life is a series of new beginings…
    Brother in Law, Bob

    • Bob, I remember that day with John. ALL of us were frantic! The imaginations just took over and we were spinning out of control. Thankfully, everything turned out all right for BOTH of them!

      Nobody ever warns us how many things parents can find to worry about when they take on the raising of a child, do they? When they’re little, there’s one set of concerns; even after they launch from the nest, there’s a whole new set of worries.

      Thanks for stopping by and helping me worry. It was great just seeing that text and knowing he was safe. We put them in God’s Hands, but part of us still wants control, huh?!

    • Kim, Domer finally texted me that he’s okay. Whew! I envisioned all kinds of terrible things. Thanks for your concern, and you’re so right — they might be big, tough men, but they’ll always be our babies!

    • I don’t know whether to be complimented or shamed, Linda, haha! You can’t imagine the scenarios flying through my mind. I probably should have written down a few and killed two birds with one stone — given my vivid imagination something worthwhile to do AND come up with some fascinating plots for upcoming novels! Thanks for sharing my concern.

      • Here’s the grin. The time came when I used to fuss at my mother for not calling ME! She’d take off to the yarn shops or whatever with her friends – all of them over 80 – and then they’d decide to stop for coffee or whatever. She’d coming dragging in an hour late (never remembered the cell phone I bought her) and I’m be tearing out my hair, saying, “WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?????”

        • Oh wow, that’s too funny! And how blessed you are that she was so active, interested, and interesting. For I have no doubt she must have been one cool senior citizen (and she probably hated that term like my mom does!)

  5. You know, once my daughter was driving from colorado to california in january and she didn’t call when she got home…even though i had the phone by my bed and told her i’d wait up until i heard. She finally called about 3 in the morning and said her golden lab (Betty) had kept nudging her and whining and nudging her until when she finally called me, Betty laid down and fell asleep. Dogs have a 6th sense. Gotta love ’em.

    • Isn’t it funny how dogs just *know* these things? It’s almost as if your prayers were relayed to Betty! I’m glad your daughter, too, arrived safe and sound — we try not to worry or hover, but sometimes, well, we can’t help ourselves.

  6. You should do what I do when I don’t hear from my daughter. Post a status message on his Facebook page asking if he’s okay. He’ll be so embarrassed, he’ll respond faster than you can say, “Notre Dame rocks!”

    • Oh, dear, that must be so much worse! Thanks for putting it in perspective for me, Hipster. Usually, he’s pretty good about keeping in touch. Throw in some of his friends and that goes out the window!

  7. I’m terrible about forgetting to call or text when I get to my destination. My parents know this, which is why my mom usually calls me. It’s amazing really, that she often calls within ten minutes of me getting home. It’s like she mapped out my trip and set a timer!

    I’m glad you did hear from him and all is well :)

    • Thanks, Janna. Your mom is a better “tracker” than I am (of course, she probably has a better idea when you’re leaving, ha!). I didn’t factor in Domer’s getting lost (which happened a couple of times) or how many friends he was picking up along the way. Thankfully, everything turned out despite my worries!

    • Definitely! If you don’t, you might not hear from her until Thanksgiving. We moms think we worry when they’re little; send them off to college and the BIG worries surface. Good luck to both of you — I’m sure she’s having a blast!

  8. Debbie, I am the exact same way on worrying about loved ones on the road or traveling period. I always love when I can get a quick phone call just I know they are ok! And agreed on dogs having a special, extra sense :)

    • I’m glad I’m not the only one to worry when a loved one hits the road, Mike! There are sooo many things that can go wrong, from inadvertently falling asleep at the wheel to car trouble to another motorist’s distracted driving. It’s a wonder *any* of us arrive safely at our destinations! Thanks for stopping by.

  9. Oh Debbie, you speak of every mother’s (father’s too but less so in my experience) wild imagination when that phone doesn’t ring. And,I can relate, the only solution is to hear from your child. You , my friend, are not alone. Hugs, Kathy

    • Thanks, Kathy. It was such a relief to get his text upon arrival and his phone call upon his return. Funny thing is, I don’t think it ever crossed his mind that I might be worried! Sure, he’s a good driver and a good young man, but that doesn’t protect them from danger. And not hearing when they’re on the road is the worst kind of torture. Thanks for sharing my agony!

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