Life without hope is a year without spring. ~William Arthur Ward, American motivational writer
I Monkey here.
Y’all aren’t going to believe what nearly happened!
Mama and The Kid (Domer, my brofur) were preparing the Christmas Day feast.
Turkey, dressing, cranberries, sweet potatoes, pies. The Works.
There was a LOT of running around the kitchen. Pots and pans were sailing through the air. The stove was going full blast. The fridge was belching out its contents, and the table was set and ready to hold it all.
I was lying where I could see everything best … right in the middle of the floor, don’t you know?
Mama carved up about half the turkey and slid the rest into the fridge so they could chow down without worrying about attracting bacteria to the uneaten portion.
Well, they eventually finished, and Mama went to the fridge to pull the other half of The Bird out for carving and storage.
That Bird was right at my level, people, so what could I Monkey do but try to grab a hunk of it?
You should’ve seen how FAST they moved! The Kid grabbed me and held me back while quick-fingered Mama snatched the entire platter right out from under my nose.
And my open mouth.
Doggone it all, and here I Monkey was salivating for some tasty bird, too.
Oh, well, I guess it just goes to show that I’m getting slower in my “old” age. I’m going to have to step it up, huh?
So, I’m already plotting my moves for the next time The Feast rolls around.
If I can tangle Mama’s feet and force her to drop The Bird from its platter and onto the floor, why, I Monkey will promptly pounce on it and have a feast of my own.
Without kibbles.
It could happen, don’t you think?
Hope springs eternal — or some such.
Signing off,
I Monkey (catching a snooze since I didn’t catch The Big Bird, humph)
Musings by an ND Domer's Mom 
Yikes, you little devil. Mama needs a gate to keep you out of the kitchen, ha! 😀
Miss Eliza, Mama tried that gate-thingy, but I Monkey managed to talk her out of it. I think she just got tired of moving it around. They tried to teach me “Place” at Puppy School — where a pup is supposed to go and lie down to be out of the way — but I failed to do that, too. My teacher said I knew the command, but I was just stubborn. Yep, that’s me!
Wren can be very stubborn, too! I suppose she would call it ‘independent.’ 😀
I Monkey hear it’s because we’re so doggone smart!
*shrugs* Fur babies will be fur babies. I say go for it if you can. That’s what we do here. Sorry you missed the chance. One good thing though. A big hunk of that bird would not be good for you, so there is that. I’m so short I never get a chance on the refer shelves, so I wish you luck next time. – Twiggy
Hiya, Twiggy. I Monkey am sorry you didn’t get a chance to go for The Bird. I’ll bet Tempeste would’ve, if she could’ve. Mama did give me a taste and wow, that was yummy!
Luckyyyyyyy👍
Don’t tell your mama, but I have just the training video for you. Watch the Bumpus hounds in A Christmas Story a few times, and you may be able to hone your technique a bit! Of course, they had the advantage of running in a pack, but you still might be able to pick up a tip!
Oh, Miss Linda, that video was hilarious. And it shows that I Monkey really need a pack! I wonder if I can convince Mama to get me a bro or a sis … of the fur-kind. Hmm, I could tell her it would make a great Christmas present and would take some of the load off her by giving me a playmate. I’ll work on that, hee hee!
LOL! We didn’t have to try and catch the bird because mom saved some scraps for us. Man it was good. We almost went nuts waiting until they were all finished their dinner because we get what mom calls, left overs. We don’t care. It was worth the wait and then the next day, everyone had leftovers so we got some more. Best Christmas ever! Dot the Dog and Little Lia.
Hi Dot and Lia! I Monkey managed to work my magic, too, and I wheedled some tasty bites of Bird from Mama. You’re so right — it was delicious! Why humans only have something that yummy once or twice a year puzzles me.
🐶🐶🍗🦃
Oh, gosh… this had me laughing so much!! Good try, Monkey!
I always remember the time my sister dropped a “dulcolax” on the kitchen floor and there was a major scramble to beat her sheltie to it!
Better luck next time, Monkey!
Uh-oh. I Monkey grabbed a vitamin tablet once, and Mama had a fit. It was fine — I imagine Dulcolax would have more side effects, heh heh! Glad you got a kick out of my story, Miss Kelly. Having pups yourself, you know how hard it is to pry something out of our mouths when we’ve worked so hard to get at it!
Monk, you should have heard me LAUGHING whilst reading your post. You are one HILARIOUS doggie! I think you got a lot of Mama’s talent for the written word.
“If I can tangle Mama’s feet and force her to drop The Bird from its platter and onto the floor, why, I Monkey will promptly pounce on it and have a feast of my own.
Without kibbles.
It could happen, don’t you think?”
LOL! Yes, I definitely think it could happen!
Thank you for another AWESOME post, Mr. Monk. I always enjoy your voice.
Wishing you and Mama a fabulous week and New Year! X
Mr. Ron, I Monkey am delighted you liked my story about the Big Bird. In all fairness, Mama did save me some tidbits of it, so now I know for myself just how yummy it is! And that just makes me all the more determined to figure out how I can get more of it at the next feast. Gee, I’ve got a whole year — surely some idea will come to me in that length of time, right??
Mama said to tell you she misses your posts but is grateful to hear from you here. Yesterday, it was in the mid-60s; today, it’s 21 with a howling wind. This is some crazy weather!
Hope you have a wonderful New Year! Don’t lose touch with us, okay?! ;}
My tail is wiggling with laughter Monkey! Yorkie here. You may not have caught the Big Bird, but you earned some sliced boneless turkey! And that’s a win! 🥇
Hey, Yorkie! I Monkey am happy to know I made you giggle! You’d better believe Mama gave me some of those turkey pieces. I have perfected the art of staring her down with my sad-eyed look while sitting beneath her as she eats. And since I’m on medication for my itchies, she feels bad for that and gives me a nibble now and then. To make up for my misery, you know.
I’m sure a dog of your intelligence could learn to open the fridge door! Practice all year while your mama is out, and then next Feast-time, you’ll be ready! What a surprise it will be for Mama when she goes back for seconds only to find the Bird gone – hehe!
Oh, Miss FF, you crack me up! I Monkey am of a mind to do just that! After all, Shelties are known for being quite intelligent, and if a Golden Retriever can learn to open the fridge door, why, I’m sure I can, too. Thank you immensely for the suggestion (and I’ll let you know how it turns out!).