Dallas here.
Sometimes life is so exciting I can hardly stand it!
One recent Sunday evening, I was snoozing and Mama was working at her computer when she heard a fluttering sound overhead.
And saw something brown and winglike poking through a vent.
Thinking it was a bird, she called a handyman for advice. He told her to take a covering and duck-tape it to the ceiling so whatever IT was couldn’t get inside.
When she finished doing that, she turned out the light and started upstairs. But something ZOOMED past her, apparently in a hurry to get there first!
Mama recognized the thing immediately, and she started screaming like a little girl. Really, Mama, how’s that supposed to help??
“Bat!” she hollered, again and again, probably thinking the thing needed to know what it was.
Grandma came running and flung open the back door, hoping Bat would make a hasty getaway. When it didn’t, she grabbed a broom and handed it to Mama.
“You want me to beat it with this?” Mama asked.
“No, just shoo it out,” Grandma said.
Well, nobody ever said I’m not an opportunist. While the door was open, I raced outside to alert the neighbors.
With Grandma shouting and Mama swinging that broom like a crazy woman, can you blame me?
I didn’t go too far, though, because I wanted to see how this thing was going to play out.
Battie must have been confused because he flew back downstairs and started doing laps! Round and round he went, gradually expanding his flight path to include the kitchen as well.
When the poor thing finally tired of the game and swooped outside — helped by Mama’s broom — I raced in just before Mama could slam the door behind him.
Since then, Mama’s had two fellas out to find where Bat’s entrance is; both came up empty-handed. Gotta give Bat props — he’s nearly as clever as I am.
Days later, the vent coverings are still up, hanging by threads, and we all have raw nerves. Whatever you do, don’t tiptoe behind Mama and touch her, or you might wish you hadn’t!
P.S. Mama and I are taking a few days off (for reals, this time!). We’ll miss you — don’t forget about us, okay? See you soon!
Musings by an ND Domer's Mom 
I have done the bat mambo and had to laugh out loud. Have a good time and stay dry.
Is it mean for part of me to be glad that I’m not the only one chosen to deal with bats, John?? Glad you got a kick out of the story (and probably more than a few memories of your own dealing with one!)
Soot covered bat on a white ceiling. Looked like a psychological test.
Yikes!! But at least he was still so you could catch him, huh?!
He kept bumping up against it. It was like a stencil.
Hello, Dallas! What an exciting event. I have bats living in the barn at the end of my garden, they are fascinating. I hope your ugly toy is doing well. I hope you and Mama have a great few days off, I shall try not to miss you chaps too much.
You have bats, too, Lucy?? Gee, I hope yours stay put instead of trying to zip into your house! Yes, Dallas still has his ugly toy — in fact, I caught him tossing it about earlier today!
Hurrah for the ugly toy! I am pleased he is enjoying it. My bats stay very much outside, they haven’t made their way in yet. Funny little things, I am rather fond of them.
Want some more?? I’m getting good at catching them, and Dallas says he’d be glad to ship you all I can catch!!
How very kind! My bats would be delighted of the company. Many thanks to Dallas!
Hey there, Dallas! Another GREAT post, buddy! You are such a wonderful writer because I was on the edge of my seat reading this. What an exciting story!
Glad to hear the bat is finally out and hope that you and Mama find out where the entrance is.
Enjoy your few days off. And please tell Mama she will be missed, but we won’t forget about her (or you). See you both when you back!
Have a great weekend!
X
We still don’t know for sure where Battie came in, Ron, but we don’t think it FLEW in when I opened the door for Dallas to go outside. I think we’d have seen it then!
I’m glad you found some enjoyment reading the story. And I hope you NEVER have to find a bat swooping around your home! It’s positively frightening, knowing they can carry rabies and bite!! And they’re really quite small, so there are a LOT of places they can hide!
Hope the rest of your week goes well — I’ll catch up on my blog-reading and commenting when I can!
I suspect that bat could have driven someone batty. 🙂 Speaking of driving, had a good trip, and be safe!
Oh, for sure, Linda — especially if we hadn’t seen him fly back outside!! I was just about to pack up and head for a motel, ha! And you know, I’m still checking every night before I go to bed to see if one of his buddies is lurking about! Stay safe in those storms — we’re supposed to get several days of Bill’s remnants, none of which we need in this water-soaked Midwest!
HahaHA! You should be more sympathetic to your poor mama, Dallas! Having once had to fend off a massive (well, tiny) killer (well, harmless) bat myself, I fully understand the shrieking! No wonder she’s leaving home for a while! Hope you both have a great trip!
Thanks for empathizing, FF! If I’d been smart, I’d have vacated long before the bat ever got in — though I hate to think what kind of parties he’d have held in my absence!
An exciting day at your place, Dallas, though I must admit I don’t envy Mama trying to shoo that thing out of the house!
Mama’s getting pretty good at shooing them out, Miss Suzi. Although honestly, I don’t want to think about what kind of shape they’re in when they leave — their tiny bat-hearts are probably beating overtime!!
Too funny, Debbie. Although I am sure no one was laughing at the time. I can just picture you racing around the house with a broom with Dallas barking. Since you couldn’t find a hole in the house, did you ever think maybe Bat came through door?
One previous bat *did* come through the door, Pat. Ever since, we’ve been very cautious about opening it. This one, I’m afraid, slipped in through one of the vents placed under the eaves to help the roof “breathe.” Or so we’ve been told. Apparently, they can slip through a crack the size of a dime — who knew?!?
OMG, I don’t know what I’d do if a bat showed up in my place. How terrifying. Made for a great read, though. Enjoy your time away!
I was pretty scared, too, Monica — familiarity, I’m afraid, helped! Not that one ever wants to be “on speaking terms” with a bat, ha!
Oh my!!!! Enjoy your break! Miss you already.
Missed y’all fiercely, too, my friend!
Time to move LOL! Terminix or something!
I think if we’d found more than one we just might have moved, Tanya! As it was, a singleton can show up pretty much any time, so now that he’s gone (or so we hope!), we’re okay. Nerves still ragged, though!
Wow a bat! And once again you overcame. BUT you painted an excellent picture of the mayhem. Mom’s are so helpful aren’t they? On the other hand unless you are a very good shot a broom is probably better than a gun. We had a bat that lived by the front door for awhile so we stopped using the front door until he left. I’m not sure what we would do with an inside bat but I am pretty sure my kid wouldn’t have been much help and I would be on the hysterical side and the pups – well, that would be a whole other story. Good job…and better you than me! :-D. Enjoy your time off.
You don’t know how tempted I was to use the gun, Kb! Domer wouldn’t have been any more helpful than Dallas in this case. Bats give him the heebie-jeebies! All’s well that ends well, and we can only hope Bat was so traumatized that he’s spread the word to his friends NOT to approach this nuthouse!!
I don’t think I’d like having a bat in the house. I have a crafty lizard I’m dealing with now… last sighting was as it ran under the stove. I have 3 cats and would like to know why none of them can be bothered to find this guy!
E-w-w-w-w, a lizard?!! How does one run something like that back out the door?? I’m guessing, of course, that you don’t just STEP on it, ha!